Feel It, Don't Feed It: A Guide to Emotional Balance
Emotional Regulation is something many of us struggle with, yet the science of happiness and well-being has revealed powerful strategies that can make a real difference.
Engaging in bird watching can serve as a mindful practice that helps regulate emotions and reduce stress.
In this guide, we’ll explore evidence-based approaches to emotional regulation, drawing on the latest research in positive psychology and behavioral science. You’ll learn practical strategies you can implement today, backed by studies from leading researchers in the field.
Whether you’re just starting your wellness journey or looking to deepen your practice, these insights will help you make meaningful progress.
Understanding Emotional Regulation
Before diving into strategies, it’s important to understand why emotional regulation matters for our overall well-being.
Mindful attention builds emotional regulation and presence, key ingredients in well-being. Noticing nearby birds also fosters a sense of connection to place and others, boosting positive emotions and calm.
The connection between emotional regulation and happiness is well-documented in research. When we actively work on this area of our lives, we often see ripple effects in other domains—from our relationships to our work performance.
Research insight: Engaging in bird watching can serve as a mindful practice that helps regulate emotions and reduce stress. (Langer, E.)
Strategy 1: Mindfulness
Mindful attention builds emotional regulation and presence, key ingredients in well-being. Noticing nearby birds also fosters a sense of connection to place and others, boosting positive emotions and calm.
How to apply this:
Spend 10 minutes outdoors practicing active noticing: focus on birds’ sounds, colors, and small behaviors; write down five new details you observe, pausing for three slow breaths between each.
Research note: “Mindfulness meditation trains the brain to observe thoughts and emotions without attachment, reducing stress and improving emotional regulation at work.” — Keng et al., 2011
Strategy 2: Stress Reduction
Quick, repeatable de-stressors keep stress from snowballing. Positive emotion buffers pain and recharges attention for what matters most.
How to apply this:
Take 10 minutes to sit with a friendly dog (or view calming dog photos) while breathing slowly—aim for 6–8 breaths per minute.
Strategy 3: Stress Relief
Brief calming rituals reduce stress load and restore emotional balance. Consistent micro-practices build resilience and increase positive emotions over time.
How to apply this:
Set a 10-minute timer to gently pet a dog (yours, a friend’s, or at a safe dog-friendly space) while taking slow breaths; if no dog is available, view calming dog photos and practice paced breathing.
What the Research Shows
The strategies we’ve discussed aren’t just anecdotal—they’re backed by rigorous scientific research. Here’s what the evidence tells us:
Key findings:
- Almost 90% of dog owners say their favorite thing is the dog’s unconditional happiness when they come home: Reflects emotional support dogs provide to owners. (Elias Weiss Friedman (collected from dog owners))
- Almost 90% of dog owners say their favorite thing is the dog’s unconditional happiness when they come home: Reflects emotional support dogs provide to owners. (Elias Weiss Friedman (collected from dog owners))
- Seven years running at the top of the World Happiness Report: Finland and Denmark have held the top spots in global happiness rankings since 2012. (World Happiness Report)
- 70-80% of people experience a life-threatening event; only 8-10% develop PTSD: Prevalence of trauma and PTSD in the general population (Epidemiological data referenced by Dr. Sue Varma)
- Optimists live 10-15% longer and have 30% less likelihood of anxiety and depression: Health and longevity benefits of optimism (Meta-analysis of over 200,000 people cited by Dr. Sue Varma)
Research insights:
Engaging in bird watching can serve as a mindful practice that helps regulate emotions and reduce stress. — Langer, E.
Experiencing awe, even with its complex emotional components, leads to greater feelings of connection and well-being. — Keltner & Haidt
Birds can function as environmental indicators, guiding our understanding of local ecosystems and inviting attentive observation. — National Audubon Society
The unconditional love and nonjudgmental presence of dogs reduce stress and pain, providing emotional comfort. — Friedman et al., 2016
Putting It Into Practice
Knowing the science is one thing—putting it into practice is another. Here’s how to start:
Start small: Pick just one strategy from this guide and commit to trying it for a week. Small, consistent actions compound over time.
Track your progress: Notice how you feel before and after implementing these practices. Awareness helps reinforce positive habits.
Be patient: Meaningful change takes time. Research shows it can take anywhere from 18 to 254 days to form a new habit, with an average of 66 days.
Get support: Consider using tools designed to help you build these habits. Apps like Neurise provide personalized, science-backed recommendations tailored to your specific needs and goals.
Quick-start actions:
- Spend 10 minutes outdoors practicing active noticing: focus on birds’ sounds, colors, and small behaviors; write down five new details you observe, pa…
- Take 10 minutes to sit with a friendly dog (or view calming dog photos) while breathing slowly—aim for 6–8 breaths per minute.
- Set a 10-minute timer to gently pet a dog (yours, a friend’s, or at a safe dog-friendly space) while taking slow breaths; if no dog is available, view…
Conclusion
Improving emotional regulation is a journey, not a destination. The strategies we’ve explored in this guide—backed by research from leading scientists in positive psychology—offer a roadmap for meaningful progress.
Remember that small, consistent actions often outperform ambitious but unsustainable efforts. Start with one technique that resonates with you, practice it until it feels natural, then gradually expand your repertoire.
The science is clear: we have more control over our well-being than we often realize. By applying evidence-based strategies, you can make real progress toward a happier, more fulfilling life.
Take the Next Step
Ready to put these insights into action? Neurise makes it easy with personalized, science-backed recommendations delivered daily. Our app learns what works for you and helps you build lasting habits for happiness and well-being.
Download Neurise and start your journey to a happier life today.
Sources
- Langer, E.. Mindfulness research on active noticing. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/20558000/
- Keltner & Haidt. Awe: The Greater Good Science Center. https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/what_is_awe
- National Audubon Society. National Audubon Society. https://www.audubon.org/
- Friedman et al., 2016. The Healing Power of Pets: Harnessing the Amazing Ability of Pets to Make and Keep People Healthy. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0143129385
- Allen et al., 2002. The presence of a companion animal reduces pain perception and physiological stress responses during a cold pressor task.. https://doi.org/10.1016/S0197-4580(01)00415-9
- Russell et al., 2018. The Danish Secret to Happy Kids. https://www.amazon.com/dp/1473664014
- Helliwell et al., 2022. World Happiness Report. https://worldhappiness.report/yur2022/
- Juul, 2015. The Danish Secret to Happy Kids. https://www.amazon.com/dp/1473664014
- Gratz et al., 2017. Emotional regulation frameworks; health correlates of suppression. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12671-017-0791-2
- Musselman et al., 2016. Type D personality research. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12020-015-0630-5
- Varma, 2021. Common psychological statistic referenced by Dr. Sue Varma. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/hi-there-im-sue/202101/why-worrying-doesnt-work
- Boehm & Kubzansky, 2012. Meta-analysis of over 200,000 people on optimism and longevity. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12160-011-9379-9
- Cornelius et al., 2021. Emotional support and co-rumination: Empirical insights on emotional regulation. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33842631/
- Rose, 2002. The role of co-rumination in the development of internalizing symptoms in girls. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12521263/
- Duncan et al., 2020. Effects of supportive communication on emotional resilience. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2020.110234
- Nolen-Hoeksema et al., 2008. Cognitive emotion regulation: Theory and evidence. https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2008-13853-002
- Smyth et al., 2008. Expressive Writing and Health: Review of the Literature. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0012250
- Berkman et al., 2021. Meditations for Mortals: Four Weeks to Embrace Your Limitations and Make Time for What Counts. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0062871776
- Phillips, 2010. On Kindness. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0300167640
- Keng et al., 2011. Keng, S. L., Smoski, M. J., & Robinson, M. D. (2011). Effects of mindfulness on psychological health: A review of the literature.. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12671-011-0049-3
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